Paranoia and Panic

So, I find in life, and even more so in law school, knowing who to trust is difficult.

I would like to think that I have at least moderate judgment when it comes to others. I mean, I've been wrong a few times, but haven't we all? Of course when I'm wrong, I'm usually hugely wrong, but whatever.

I guess what it comes down to is that there are people in my life who I know better than to trust. Their inherent selfishness at every turn is like a blaring alarm that they're all about themselves and no one else. And yes, these people exist and they're practically unavoidable. But I have started to allow these people to get closer to me than I'd like--I've allowed them to infiltrate an alarming amount of my life. All this fully knowing that they'd throw me under the bus as per instinct.

And I've been able to ignore it. I've even felt bad about not trusting them--it's stupid, I know.

I know who I can trust. And I love those people. I don't ever have to worry about them. I don't have to spend time crying and wondering and distrusting.

I think it's time to downsize. Those who I have no trust in have to be the first to go. They are like a cancer on my well-being, and quite frankly, I am tired of being sick.